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15 May 2009 @ 09:15 am
Creep Magnet  
Now, you've already read about Mr. Taxi, who's degree of creepy seems to depend on the day, the moon cycle, and how much attention he seems to need at that time. He's taken to showing up at the store almost every day, hanging around the counter, and occasionally following customers around the store and 'helping' them with their Warhammer purchases.  He wants desperately to be considered one of our regulars, someone who we like to see and are very good to, and although the staff is nice to him, everyone is more than a little tired of putting up with him every...damned...day.  As always, there's that infantile side of Mr. Taxi that makes everyone's skin crawl, which gives off the impression of a sex-crazed retard.


She's in her forties, wears her polo shirt with a popped collar, and stares at you in a way that Pink characterized as though 'she is trying to decide how best to kill you and wear your still-bleeding skin.' That sums it up pretty nicely, I thought. She also hits on anything with a pulse, male or female, which is all well and good, but like many female chauvinists, believes that everyone simply -must- be interested in her.

I noticed her first one Friday evening, small alongside her taller male counterparts, talking with a relatively harsh voice, eying each of them with all the jaded interest of a meat handler, as though she were weighing each along a series of criteria that we have no way of knowing. You can tell she's done this exact routine before, joining a gaming group, learning about each of them, fluttering between them, until finally settling on one for a while...every look, every word is like she's attempting to prove something to an unseen witness.

She's latched onto one of my bosses, the Cajun. She spends extravagant amounts of money in the store, and of course that causes him to bow and scrape to her for good reason, she's moving product...but when watching her, it's not love of Warhammer that's driving it, she doesn't even know the details of the army she plays and it bit her in the ass last tournament, so it seems like she is so obsessed with being 'one of the guys' that she is willing to spend over $1,000 in merchandise just to try and get her foot in the door, meanwhile they all sort of look at her like she's a little crazy.

See? Even the socially-awkward ranks of my tactical gamers can sense it.

When she's present and I'm working the counter, she'll come up to me and ask about my piercings and hair color, giving me that eerie stare as though what I'm saying is deeply fascinating to her on some level, weighing me the same as the rest, a side of beef on the slab.  The trouble with this is that I am a well-adjusted bisexual, I've got nothing to prove to her, and I'm certainly not attracted to her, so all it succeeds in doing is cementing into place the creep-factor.

What should I name her?  You can post anonymously.
 
 
 
hecatemahadevihecatemahadevi on July 24th, 2009 03:32 pm (UTC)
I vote for… "She-Reaver who thinks she should breed."

OK, it's a little long… "Virago"? "Battleaxe"? "Aging Frat-Girl"?

Maybe "Meat-Lady" because of how she views everyone else?
geekherdergeekherder on July 24th, 2009 10:14 pm (UTC)
She-Reaver and Battleaxe suit me. ^^
(Anonymous) on July 24th, 2009 10:10 pm (UTC)
butcherella?
geekherdergeekherder on July 24th, 2009 10:14 pm (UTC)
-snort-